Gary Bloomer | SHAKING THE TREE # 253
If you’d told me a few years ago that a television show about an American football coach managing a struggling English soccer team would become the most important philosophy textbook of the decade, I’d have laughed at you.
But here we are. Ted Lasso isn’t simply a sitcom; it’s a masterclass in developing emotional intelligence, in how to become a leader worth following, and how to be a decent human being in a world that often rewards the opposite.
We watched for the fish-out-of-water humour and the football, but we stayed for the profound, quietly revolutionary lessons that stick with you long after the credits roll.
In our culture, where we’re obsessed with winning at all costs, Ted Lasso offered a different playbook. Here are the lessons I believe we should all be taking into our own locker rooms—be they offices, schools, or family homes.
1. Why goldfish are the wisest critters on Earth
Ted’s advice to Sam—”Be a goldfish”—is one of the show’s most iconic lines for a reason. A goldfish supposedly has a 10-second memory. Ted isn’t advocating for ignorance; he’s preaching the vital skills of acceptance and letting go.
We hold onto our mistakes, our embarrassments, and our losses, playing them on a loop until they define us. Sadly, those experiences also confine us.
But the most successful people—the happiest people—are the ones who can feel the sting of failure, learn from it, and then swim on. They don’t let a missed penalty, a failed project, or a harsh word poison the next moment. The past is a place of reference, not residence. Be a goldfish.
2. Curiosity over judgement
In the pilot, Ted disarms a cynical reporter not with a clever retort, but with a question. He asks about the origin of the “Biscuits with the Boss” ritual. This is the cornerstone of his entire methodology. Ted meets prejudice with curiosity, hostility with inquiry.
We are hardwired to judge what we don’t understand. It’s a lazy, energy-saving default setting for the brain. But choosing to be curious? That takes effort.
Being curious forces us to see the person behind the prickly exterior, or to see the reason behind the resistance.
Whether you’re dealing with a difficult colleague, a contrary family member, or your own inner critic, replacing “What an idiot” with “I wonder why they think that?” changes everything.
3. Leadership is about people
Ted knew nothing about the offside trap, but he knew everything about the human heart. His greatest achievements weren’t tactical masterstrokes but human interventions: mending the rift between Jamie and Roy; helping Nate find his voice (before and after he lost it), and seeing the leader within the wounded Rebecca.
Ted helps us understand that a team that trusts, respects, and cares for one another will always outperform a collection of talented individuals riddled with needless competition, toxic masculinity, male insecurity, and testosterone fueled ego.
The best managers, teachers, and parents aren’t just technicians; they are gardeners. They don’t force the plant to grow; they create the environment where growth is inevitable.
4. The truth piss you off before it sets you free
Rebecca’s journey is the ultimate testament to this. Her entire scheme was born from a festering wound of betrayal. It was only when she was forced to confront the truth of her actions and her pain that she could begin to heal.
We see this with Jamie Tartt admitting his father’s abuse, Roy Kent confronting his fear of life after football, and Keeley owning her ambition.
The show never shies away from the messy, angry, uncomfortable work of facing the truth. It argues that the temporary discomfort of honesty is infinitely better than the permanent, corrosive damage of a lie—whether that lie is told to others or to ourselves.
5. Believe
It started as a joke, a naive word on a yellow piece of tape. It became a mantra. In our jaded, irony-poisoned world, “Believe” can feel cringeworthy.
We’re taught that cynicism is smart and optimism is foolish.
Ted Lasso calls that bluff.
Belief isn’t a guarantee of success; it’s the fuel for the journey. It’s the stubborn, defiant choice to have hope even when the odds are stacked against you. It’s the decision to believe in your team, in your loved ones, and most importantly, in your own capacity to get back up.
The final lesson, of course, is that there is no finish line.
The work of becoming a better person, a better teammate, a better friend, and a better content creator, is endless—that is, if we’re doing it well and doing it with integrity, passion, humility, and commitment So, let’s take a page from the Lasso playbook.
Let’s be endlessly curious instead of being relentlessly judgmental.
Let’s forgive fully and swiftly.
Let’s lead with integrity and kindness.
Let’s all realize that more than we know, we don’t know and that it’s OK to ask for help.
And let’s consider that when we inevitably mess up, let’s have the courage to feel it, to learn from it, and then, with a simple shake of the head, let’s be bold enough to be a goldfish.
Now, who’s up for a biscuit?
As always, thanks for reading.
—Gary
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Next time on Shaking the Tree: Your attention diet: what you consume is what you create
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Originally from the U.K., Gary Bloomer is a writer, branding advocate, marketing specialist, and an award-winning graphic designer.
His design work has been included in Creative Review (one of the UK’s largest design magazines). Since 2009, he has answered over 5,000 marketing and business questions in the Know-How Exchange of MarketingProfs.com, placing him among the top 3% of contributors. He lives in Wilmington, Delaware, USA.